Enery and the libido

Jung talks about how energy moves from the unconscious to the conscious and back again. He also talks about how this energy is tapped when we work. Consciousness takes energy and that energy can be exploited and trapped. What I want to do is to learn how to work yet keep my unconscious flowing. That would be the creative process. Also what becomes important is having a conscious conversation, not just one person doing all the talking. I'm very interested in conversation and how my energy flows well when I have one. I'm able to be very supporting yet I feel supported too. It starts by having a conversation with someone about things I'm interested in and sharing between us. Its amazing how much more energy I'm getting from being in therapy, writing back and forth in my writing group, walking or writing in nature and spending time with people who are interested in spirituality. When I'm in conversation I feel alert and in my body. The body is important too and psychic energy or libido from the unconscious to the conscious affects our bodies too. My body feels more secure when I'm in conversation or have had expression during the day. I feel happier and more energetic and I wonder how much isolation has to do with trapped and exploited libido. I

Jesus and the feminine

I'm getting more interested in Jesus. I'm interested in His relationship with the feminine and how Jesus supports my quest for incorporating more feminine spirituality into my life. The Communion can be a mix of masculine and feminine and you can eat the God. How did Jesus relate to His mother and wife? Did he have a daughter, Sarah? How is it to be in relationship with the King? There is joy and comfort yet Jesus suffers. We do not get away from suffering yet Jesus, in his feminine side, comforts us and shows us how to be human with out loosing the feminine. I am looking for a man who can show me the way to my feminine side and I think that man is Jesus. Jesus does have a good relationship to the body and doesn't reject it the way some people say He does. Jesus is in His body, is fully human and divine at the same time. We can have moments of that, maybe, with hard work. We have to look for Jesus and look for ourselves in Him, let Him mirror us and interpret Him in a way that mirrors us. That is relationship with God, just as God is mirrored by us and sees Himself through us. We mirror each other and just like us God has different aspects and personalities. We need to be in right relationship, not a relationship of rejection. God rejects Himself in those who He rejects, just like us. Jesus is a softer God while Hashem is still rejecting parts. Hashem rejects to be whole and to discover himself and what He wants to be. A more feminine, peaceful, spiritual leader and teacher is what I find and am discovering in Jesus.

Walking

I am now walking. In the forest, by the river, on a treadmill. Forty minutes this hot summer afternoon. A little bit more after dinner. Jennifer offering to show me trails in the parks and walk with me. I'm into the Earth. Working with Earth as an element and with fairy and fey energy. Taylor told me about a good book. I'm waiting for it from Amazon. The Earth is alive and the forest is alive. Walking gets me into a light trance state and then when I sweat and stop I feel in my body, my body is alive too and as Caryn says it has a wisdom of its own. What is really interesting is the body, being in the body and experiencing the body. Both in nature and in community. Being with others who like and accept my body, who love me. And me loving the feel of my body of my new hobby which is walking. Down to 227.4 Need to take of 20 lbs more this year and keep going. I don't need the weight anymore and the light trance state of walking is taking the place of the trance state of eating pasta or drinking wine.